Eavesdown Abbey

Woke up feeling meh, but I don't think (I hope, hope, hope) I'm getting sick. Fingers crossed.

I fell down the YouTube rabbit hole of journals and planners - never a good idea. Then I start thinking I want to do this or that, buy the other and the next, spend too long researching all of the above...and I know, after too many years of doing exactly that, that a: I do not plan. I am not a planner. So stop looking at planners. Right now.  
'
And b: I already have a stash of blank journals, 3 're-date and they're fine' Passion Planners I bought two years ago (the price of which has exploded, so these will be the absolute last when they're gone), and 2 Filofaxes that I don't use because, well, rings. Rings get in the way. BUT I could remove the mechanism and turn one into a sort of Midori Traveler's Notebook (did that with a 3rd Filofax I had a few years ago), but again...why??? Why? I have this stationary fixation that YouTube seriously feeds into - I had to ban myself from anything like that on Instagram - and all these ideas just end up with money spent that could better be used elsewhere. So I'm really trying to curb the ADHD side of my brain and not let the impulsivity take over. Again. If only the Autistic side could keep control of the other...*sigh* (yes, I'm generalizing and joking, but my brain, my description).

I'm seriously considering keeping away from all the usual social media for the month of January. I'm in a funk, and the constant scrolling on them (and Twitter negativity) just drags me down even more. There's so much being said, and yet none of it really means anything, you know? I've found a few articles in which the author is missing old-school blogging* (I keep saying that because one blogs on business websites too, but for a completely different reason); wouldn't it be cool if everyone took January, started a blog about "life, the universe, and everything" (all hail Douglas Adams!), and then asked at the end of the month if it fed your soul more than the cacophony elsewhere? 

A girl can dream, right? :)

I might turn my website into more of a blog (though it will be public, so not quite the same as having the ability to write 'access only' posts about the deep shit of life), but I'm not sure. It IS time to let go of the dream of making the healing work my income, so the website just might go private til the domain runs out. The dream is never going to happen, and no matter how long I beat that dead horse, it's still dead. I will never, ever stop helping people and animals, but I just have to stop hoping I can stay home, send light, and be able to pay bills and rent doing so. It breaks my heart, but in reality, the constant feeling of being a failure at business is even worse.

It's getting colder (we missed that Arctic freeze, luckily) and I think it's time for some hot chocolate. 

Night all! Stay safe and warm!


*A sample of those:
www.mygiantstrawberry.com/blog/a-love-letter-to-blogging-or-why-blogs-are-more-relevant-than-ever

https://wilwheaton.net/2022/12/and-then-it-was-december/

https://catvalente.substack.com/p/stop-talking-to-each-other-and-start 

 I live in the high desert, and it's been really dry, so rain is wonderful! I wish it would snow, and it might in the mountains, but unless it gets colder, here in town it'll just be rain. It's cold in this old house (insulation, what's that? Single pane windows...yeah!), but I'm stubbornly wearing a tshirt and leggings with two pairs of socks because...hell, I don't even know why. I need a blanket. Maybe a hoodie. I just don't want to move.

I'm banking on being able to work again started right after Xmas, and if that falls through, I am SO screwed. So fingers crossed. It's a place where my mask wearing is ok, even though I'm the only one who does, and it's part-time, which is great because 40 hours is too much anymore for various reasons. 

Checked into CounterSocial and had fun, then checked into Twitter and immediately got depressed. Jeesh. If certain elements of Twitter were elsewhere, I would drop it like a hot potato, but there are things (and some people) you can't find anywhere else and it sucks. I hate given tacit support to that asshole.

The dogs are in and sleeping happily on the rugs in the kitchen. They aren't allowed on the furniture because there's 3 of them, one a very large Rottweiller, and there wouldn't be anywhere for me and my guy to sit! lol The old man (that large Rott -he's very tall, not short and burly) is having purebred joint issues, so he's been more of a house dog of late and he loves it. They spend their time both inside and out, but the shepherd mix much prefers it outside. Our female Rott mix prefers inside, but she's somewhat annoying so she's outside quite a bit. My boy thinks he's my shadow (we adopted him after his owner died and the family didn't want the dog; he'd spent his life outside, tied up) and he stands to my waist, so moving around the house can get interesting. lol

Anyway...not much going on. Just "Hi!" to all. :)

 Tired. So tired. And my eyes ache. Which, come to find out, is yet another fun *cough, cough* post-COVID issue. I notice that my heart has a tendency to beat fast and hard for no reason...usually when I'm trying to go to sleep. It's quite disconcerting.

Got our Omicron boosters Friday afternoon, and I slept almost all day yesterday. The always affect me stronger than my guy. I don't mind; I know that means it's doing its job. Trying to do the laundry today, but if I just manage to wash the sheets and remake the bed, that'll be a win.

I am SO in love with counter.social !!! One post will get you multiple replies, and everyone is really friendly and helpful. The creator is rabid about misinformation and Nazis, too, and they're booted quickly. 

I 'm trying to find alternative ways to follow certain people that are on Twitter, like this guy, from whom I get most of my COVID information. He was the first one to mention the throat/nasal swabbing. He said he's going to post to Substack more often now, which made me happy. There's another one out of Ontario, Canada, but I haven't found ...ooooh, wait....I did! He has this! Right on!!!

Oops...the washer stopped. Catcha later!!

I still never know what to write in the subject line. 😶

Twitter is just too, too much. I like knowing what's going on, but the country is going down the tubes so quickly, and it's terrifying to witness. I can't imagine living it. We're voting here and my fingers are crossed so damned hard that we keep our governor, because the alternative is going to cause wide-ranging problems for more than just our state. I thought about moving to Canada almost 2 decades ago, and I really wish I had. It's scary to think how those of us who are older are going to be affected when our healthcare and income is taken away by those vultures.

I'm in quite the mood today.

There's clouds out there, and I wish it would rain, but so far we've just had the clouds. We desperately need the rain.